discovering the art of dicipline
My intent to write something daily so far lasted two days. What makes that discipline, that focus so hard? I am not sure if I have a good answer other than ...it takes discipline! with so many other daily activities and distractions, its easy to not be disciplined. The major question I am in need of answering now is how to stay insanely disciplined increasing this streak! To be continued....hopefully tomorrow.
Weekend away recharge
Weekends are a great way to re energize yourself. And what is a betterway than to visit a great national park to recharge your batteries and get inspired by natural beauty. This last visit was to Mt Rainier national park, Washington. What do you do to recharge and take care of yourself?
Motivational Monday - What are you excited about this Monday?
I used to dread Monday's. Waking up dreading to go to work. My weekend was the place and time to enjoy! Don’t get me wrong, I still Love the weekend, and I enjoy it to the fullest, but I no longer dread Mondays. Why is that, and how can you do the same? How can you get excited about Mondays and your week. The key is Purpose.
Before I chose to no longer accept the Monday blues, I did not have a purpose, a motivation to get out of bed on Monday. Once you discover a mission or purpose in life, and you work towards your goals every day, there is no need to dread anything anymore. Does that mean you never feel bad or do not want to sleep some more or have some extra time off? Absolutely! There are days that I do not feel great, or feel I could sleep more. My body is tired, I am mentally itchy and can get upset easily during those days. Those feelings remain, but today I am more aware of these and I take on full responsibility for managing and mastering these emotions (with help and accountability partner!) I choose to pick a different attitude!
Let me ask you: what are you excited about? I am personally excited to work towards living a life where I have the full freedom to travel, discover and explore the world, while inspiring and motivating millions of others to do the same. I want to help people to see that they can not see the world from their couch, behind their TV or computer screen. To see the world, is to go out into the world and explore it. This doesn't have to be to a far off destination, one can simply start by going to a library or coffee shop. Try a new book or new flavor of coffee. Or how about going for a nice walk and deeply connect with someone you love. One of the things I decided to change and love to do nowadays is no longer hanging in front of the TV, instead I choose to spend the time to go for a great walk with my wonderful wife and deeply connect with her each day.
How can you connect deeper and live a more meaningful Monday? What purpose do you have in life? What are your goals? What’s your mission? I love a mission from my friend Quentin McCain. His mission is to end mediocrity - he believes we all have the ability to rise above the small, meaningless stuff. To me, this includes dreading your Monday. If 95% of the people choose to feel bad about Monday, how about making the choice that you no longer will you accept Monday as a bad day. Decide to pick a mission, passion or purpose and start working on that excessively. I will guarantee you, that no Monday will ever be the same for you. Nor will your Tuesdays, by the way!
Start making the shift today, and decide right now, you no longer accept moody Monday’s, they will from now on be filled with excitement, joy, passion, curiosity and full presence. Live your life on purpose! Make a difference. Start your mission now!
P.S. Since Monday is almost over, you can still be doing something that makes today great! or start Tuesday!
What's the point? Why does your message matter?
What exactly is the point of sharing my message? This may be a question you ask yourself What difference will my word or message make in this noisy world? In a world where we are bombarded by negative messages but also the same positive messages. What difference will my voice, my opinion really make? How am I really making a difference.
If you are asking yourself these questions, you are not alone! I am asking these questions all the time, and so are some of my friends. I can tell that they also feel they do not have the power to make changes to people’s lives. Feeling powerless, or feeling that you or your message doesn’t matter is hard. What you are really saying is that you do not value yourself. You do not value your worth as a human being and the amazingness you bring to the world.
This is the ego at play. The ego is devising all sorts of ways to keep us feeling small, to keep us from being conscious and spreading the our word. Even if the word is already said many times by different people, in different forms, shapes and sizes, your word still matters - only you can say it in your way and reach the people that match your energetic vibration. I may say this message and it will not resonate with some people, yet it may resonate with others, people that do need to hear this message.
You may share the same message in your own way, and this may just be what that person needed to hear. Or perhaps this person has listened to many messages already and this has planted a seed in their mind. Perhaps your message may make that difference to them to change something they were unable or unwilling to change. YOU MATTER. An important message. Your unique talents , abilities and quirks matter. They make you, you. They make you unique… in a world of conformity, it’s easy to feel the need to blend in and not stand out, to not be unique and get lost in a world of average. A world caught up in negativity, mundane 9-5 lifestyle. Even some non 9-5 people are still caught up in living a conformed life. They deeply feel they do not have power over themselves, and others with their words or messages. That they do not matter.
It’s time to recognize that we have greatness within, to end these self-defeating thoughts and questions and go after our greatness. Telling ourselves why we are deserving of greatness and how other people need to hear our messages. We must learn to ask ourselves better questions.
What will be great if we share our message with others? It may help them get the courage to speak up in abusive relationships, it may make them think differently about themselves and see themselves more positive; it may show that they are not alone in this situation, that other people also have felt their way and have found a way out of internal struggles.
You may ask yourself why does my message matter? Only you can bring your unique gifts and talents to the world , to share them with other people. No one else has exactly the same experiences that you have in your life, as such your viewpoint will always be unique. Your overall message may be the same, but your viewpoints will be unique, your stories will be unique, your leanings will be unique.
It’s necessary to share your specific story as they will resonate with people that have a similar perspective on life, and that it may change their life for the better.
If you hold back your story, someone may not make the change because you were playing small, because you were afraid to be big and bold, because you told yourself to stay small, that you did not matter.
So what's the point?
The point is this: You do matter. You are valuable . Your story and style matters. Go out and share it. Today.
Integrating your past into your current self - what does that really mean? Why do I want to go about doing so?
The reason for this topic is because recently, we had some discussions with friends around forgiveness or not forgiving someone unless this person apologizes first. This created a friendly, but heated discussion around this idea of forgiveness.
There may be many reasons for forgiving or not forgiving one another, but the idea that was discussed is that by not forgiving , you really are giving away your power to someone else.
We talked about that it's ok to take a moment to feel upset about a situation, event or person, but it can keep lingering for many, many years. Some times, we may not even remember the event at the time. In other words, we let an event from the past, influence what we do today. While the past is already gone, these thoughts still have power over us. Sometimes the person has already moved on with their life, and we are still resentful. There are even times where this person does not even know that they have done something wrong.
I remember taking a hypnotherapy class a year or so ago, where we did muscle testing exercises where one could discover what level of resentment for family and friends are still stuck in the body. If you want to read good material on how the body keeps the score from the past, I encourage you to read Dr Joe Dispenza's work or the work of Bessel van der Kolk. The bottom line of this exercise was that I had tons of issues still unresolved from my past, some of them which I was not even aware of!
During my flight back on a work trip, perhaps triggered by our discussion of that week, I suddenly began to feel some stuff coming up for me that I had not forgiven people for, that was still lingering in me. The weird thing typically is that these things show up usually in a different way. For me, I believe it shows up during times of sudden change, or movement. This typically happens in airplanes , but I recall also no longer liking certain activities in a fair, and typically my stomach getting upset easily with bumps in a car... But this time , it came in the form of bumps during the airplane ride.
Since I was so much about talking about forgiveness and it's importance, it was time for me to walk the walk myself! I took time at that moment, to close my eyes and focus on my breathing (this is what I usually do in times where I want to do some inner work).
I felt moments from my past passing by during childhood, where I did not accept or believe that I was worth of being loved. And I discovered that I made this decision as a young boy seeing my parents argue and believing it was my fault, thus making the decision with the mind of a child to then believe I was not worth of love. This came up many times in different forms in my life that I now better understand. I also remember this being amplified by the fact that my ugly (now loving) sister came along, taken further attention away from me during that time where I needed it the most. This then dragged on into teenage years, which are already tough and having continuous fights with my parents. Obviously around different things, because I really did not know I did not love myself. I now know that I am worth of love and I am love.
At that time, and still to today, there are emotions left in my body, that trigger certain thoughts during certain events, or when I meet a certain type of person. The thoughts than reinforce these emotions and old beliefs, and I can get stuck in this vicious loop.
During this exercise and this time, I wanted to escape, open my eyes and not forgive and forget what has happened to me. But there was an inner voice, talking to me. telling me to stay with me , in order for me to process some of these emotions. After discovering what I mentioned earlier, I suddenly felt an inner peace. I felt the need to send a message to my mother and sister to forgive them and send them loving thoughts. I also had to forgive myself for holding on to those erroneous beliefs that I have been holding onto for a long time. I could finally let go of these past emotions and release them from my body, back into the universe where they came from.
This exercise to me was so invaluable, but not easy at all. And I know there are probably a lot of other issues still to be dealt with. There are layers that need to be taken off, one at the time. To slowly release all the old baggage and integrating all these old , outdated ideas into a more empowered current version of myself.
What are some old pains that you have not dealt with that keep coming back up for you? What are some of the actions you can take to forgive yourself for these pains? Who may you need to forgive in order to step back into your Power?
Last week I traveled back to Arizona for work and met up with my mentee Jack. I love to hang out with Jack because he makes me see things differently. In a sense, he's the one mentoring me! That's the beauty of volunteering. But that's not really the point of the post.
The idea of this post is to share what I have learned from him , listening and hanging out with him last week.
I oftentimes get hung up on not knowing the exact destination to which I am headed with whatever project, or goal I am working on. And as a result, I do nothing at all, or the farthest I go is spinning idea and option after option through my mind. This is so overwhelming at times that I do not do anything at all to move myself forward to my projects and goals. This then frustrates me further, adding nothing but self-pity.
But I believe this may be about to change for me, after meeting with Jack last week.
We were having dinner and afterwards we were planning to drive him back to his house in Phoenix, Arizona. The great thing about Phoenix at this time of year, is the weather is great, the roads are wide and open, and it's simply very nice to drive through any street there, with the window open and music playing. Jack told me this is what he does sometimes with his family. They just simply head out with no destination in mind, and merely are just cruising around for the pure joy of it. The feeling of escape.
This suddenly struck me. I am often so focused on a destination, that I forgot it's all about the journey to begin with. What fun is it, to just get out there, without any idea of where you are going and simply see where the road may take you. Especially in times where the destination or path to it may be unclear. I enjoyed our time together, simply driving around, listening to music and having a great conversation! Life and enjoyment can be found in the very simple things and therefore we often miss them!
I told myself that night, that I will no longer tolerate mindless wandering in my own mind, but instead just take one step onto the road, where ever that road may lead me at that time. Whether it's on the digital highway, a footpath into the forest, a walk around the block, or a drive into the unknown. It does not really matter where the destination is or the method of which you take the step. It's a matter of simply having the courage to taking that step in the first place.
What is one step that you can take today to get you started on your journey?
Easter 2018. I can not believe already 3 months have passed in 2018! Where did the time go!
Easter does have someone of a tough ring to it for our family, since it's a reminder of my dad passing in 2015 Easter. I can't believe it's already 3 years. It is also a good reminded that life can be over in a moment, and it's short , and precious and has to be enjoyed.
Recently, I have been 'in my head' a lot, feeling somewhat restless and frustrated, and not feeling 'home' here in Portland, where we moved to about 6 months ago, while there is obviously plenty to see and explore. It must be the weather... I know these are pure excuses, as pure as a chocolate Easter egg.
It most be some unconscious pain that has not been addressed. Until this moment, I have not fully dug up and excavated whatever demon this is, so far I've only dealt with it in a different way... Here are some tips on how you may overcome a similar struggle.
1. Take a walk into nature. It could be a park, a little walk around the block, it could be visiting a local coffee shop. The idea is to get out of your mind, by taking action. While this may sound simple, your mind may try to stop you and wants you to stay in your drama, this is where the mind is addicted to. Don't give in. Take one step outside. It will not magically resolve all frustrations, but before you know it, you forgot what was so upsetting. Take time to observe your surroundings. be present to sounds, sights, smells around you. There is plenty to take in and numb your mind from giving you frustrations.
2. Play some up-beat music. This for me is so super helpful. For some reason, If I play Latin music, I can not be upset or unhappy. The music simply wants me to move, even my mind so it distracts me from my frustrations. Whatever your music of choice is, use music to get and alter your state of mind. Instantly!
3. Take action. Whatever it is. Pick up a broom, and clear your home. Write a blog - it's a great way to get out of your mind and into your heart and gut. Look for someone to help, take a drive - it does not matter where to, it's a matter of getting your mind distracted and don't let it be a burden to you.
There you have it, in case Easter is not your thing, or if you're just frustrated or restless regardless of Easter, these are practical tips that can get you back into a happier mood. And finally, if you're unhappy - simply accept and embrace your feelings of unhappiness. It's ok to have them.. Please do not unload your unhappiness onto others. Simply accept your feelings, sit with them - notice them in your body... and just breathe. There will always be tomorrow. Just remember life is short. Enjoy it!
What tips do you have to get out of a state of frustration or restlessness? I look forward to hearing from you!
This is a picture where my wife and I are exploring new technologies! Your life adventure is full of adventures. Exploring new technologies is only one of the many ways in which one can explore their life. This picture was taken in Las Vegas where we we exploring robot technology to make our cocktail. A fun experience with some memorable photos to back it up.
There are always many reasons to 'celebrate' and enjoy a road trip to Vegas. One can simply observe the people, events, or the environment. If you thought you had boundaries or if you thought things were impossible to do. Think again. Vegas will give you new food for thought and helps you expand your horizon in many ways.
Go on! Take a road trip and do one thing that scares you. Explore your boundaries. Free yourself.